A former filipina actress now based in U.S. and owns website intended for OFWs posted a thread in one of the forums that goes with a question, “What is it with having another lover?”So as not to be judgemental, Im sure there are reasons why we all do what we ought to do, whether right or wrong. In the case of having an affair outside of a legit relationship or other than your significant other, it all boils down on how someone evaluates all viable options available at hand that would justify his course of action. Unfortunately, there are people who fail to do such but instead proceeded of doing it as if “bahala na” mentality (where most Filipinos are known for) then later on regret what he or she has done. On the other hand, there are people who claim that their respective spouses or partner are what pushed them to do such thing, either just to get even or they found something to that other partner which they couldn’t find from their respective spouses.
Among all these, men in general are more susceptible to having an “extra” affair because of this common malady among men such as “wala namang mawawala sa akin pag nambabae ako” - a distorted belief I would say. There are men who even tried to justify, biblically of their having other relationship, that men in biblical times have many wives. King David for one is known to have many wives. He even coveted the wife of one of his soldier, where the latter, he sent to battle with intention to let him (soldier) be killed so that he could have his wife. But look on how God punished King Solomon for his carnal act. There are also men (a self appointed philosopher) who explain the paradox of why men seek more and more relationship other than the present, - that woman was taken from a man’s rib which makes his rib cage incomplete thus, man’s continuous pursuit of finding his missing rib (woman) goes on and on until he finally finds his perfect match — A foolish reasoning, I would say because it is an unfortunate fact that there is no perfect among us, not even one.
But above all these, if we are into a situation such as this, ask God to help you get away from it and once you had managed to get out of it, try to learn from your mistakes. But if you are still in the process of toying an idea to have one, think of it a 100 times before you do it. Think of all possible consequences, your family, hurt feelings, unwanted pregnancy, etc. Just like in old school, we were taught to count up to ten when we are mad, but in this case, count of to 100, or a thousand, or up to zillion or even to eternity. The reason behind this logic is to give us ample time to think until the temptation dies.
Lastly, speaking of temptations, we cannot eliminate temptations (even Jesus was tempted for 40 days and 40 nights) but we can avoid temptations by staying away from it. Avoid things or situations that are closely associated with temptations. If you are head over heels over a guy or gal of your desire, remove all things that would trigger your desire of having an affair with him/her. If the person you desire is still in your mind despite all painstaking ways of avoiding it, my simple but effective formula - PRAYER.
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